It’s Not a Process Problem
I just wrapped up a COO role at a pre-seed startup. I was so excited when I’d started. I was getting to flex both my coaching and my operator muscles at a company building something I was incredibly passionate about. The early founder conversations were invigorating. I couldn’t wait to get to work.
On paper, the problems were fun and easy to diagnose. They were low hanging fruit, and standard for this stage:
moving targets without clear OKRs
no consistent decision-making process + decisions happening in back channels
lack of communication internally and externally
a product function without an accountable leader + a long delayed beta launch
a hiring process that didn’t exist, too many tools and data sources….and so on
So I did what I do. I presented the issues, explained why they were important and the impact they’d have, and implemented them with enthusiastic support from the founder.
And month after month, nothing stuck….
The same issues and patterns replayed over and over. More reminders. More calendar invites. More processes. More conversations about the processes, and the issues, but nothing changed.
Crucial, and what would normally be game changing moments hit - like investor calls moving into diligence, but the structure fell apart. Calls, emails, and decisions were delayed. Missed.
Why? The underlying issue wasn’t structure. It wasn’t process. The real issue: There wasn’t the lack of systems. They were people problems. Most of what look like an operations problem is actually a people problem dressed up as a process one.
And the people problem wasn’t just a founder/CEO problem. It included everyone.
What Actually Matters
Trust and clarity must come before process. You can build the best frameworks. You can have the best automation tools. But if a leader isn’t willing to stick to them, nobody will. That erodes everything: morale, confidence, execution, excellence, velocity and accountability. Consistency, and repetition builds trust. Letting go even just a little builds trust. When you skip the meetings you created, or don’t use the tool that was implemented, make decisions off-channel, or circumvent your own process — your team learns the structure isn’t real, and that the leader who created them doesn’t matter that much. They stop trusting it. They stop trusting you.
Stress is Contagious. Emotional regulation & stress management matters as much as the meeting itself. When you’re clear and grounded you listen, you process data. You create stability. When you’re burned out, you do the opposite. You make reactive decisions, create bottlenecks, reverse course, say things you regret. Your stress becomes everyone’s problem. Your team needs you as an anchor. Someone steady enough to follow through, to listen, to hold the line. That comes from managing your stress. Weathering ups and downs of growth takes a lot of mental and physical resilience.
You have to be willing to look at yourself honestly. I got caught up in the mission. I wanted to work in a space I was deeply passionate about, and flex my ops muscle again. So I downplayed the yellow and red flags I knew to look for, and not because I didn’t see them…because I REALLY wanted it to work. And the issue is never just a founder problem, or a one person problem. This isn’t about what she was doing wrong, nor was I the victim. Like any relationship, we all play a part in the dynamic, and in the system.
Ask yourself:
What habits, behaviors, or stories do I need to learn or unlearn to support my team / our growth? What would my team say?
How am I contributing to this dynamic? How would I like it do be different?
What’s one thing I can change this week that shifts how my team experiences me/my leadership?
Systems and process are fundamental, but never without their even more crucial counterpart.